More tranny stories later!
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Randomize
