kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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