worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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