I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
