I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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