i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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