It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Randomize
