I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
