Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
