she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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