I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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