Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
are you so shy because you have an std?
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Randomize
