I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
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