Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
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