So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Randomize
