Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
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