today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Randomize
