i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
