This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
