found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
