no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize