Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
