I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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