ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
