Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Randomize
