There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
