you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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