can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
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