My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
