So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Randomize
