ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Banned from zoo.
Again?
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Randomize
