if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize
