Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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