i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
