You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
In the future we'll all be gay
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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