he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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