Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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