I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Randomize
