I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
