You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize
