doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
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