Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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