I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
He is an equal opportunity slut.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
