My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
My brain says no but my pants say off.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Rumble strips road head = magical
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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