who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
