am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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