I hate all girls vehemently.
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
