I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Randomize
