guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
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