I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize
